Going Underground

Since our paperwork for the other adoption has gone to Kazakhstan, it is now a good idea for this blog to go private. Even though this blog is about the China adoption, it's just a good idea to stay on the "down low" as far as publicizing our every thought (especially when these thoughts contain swear words and silly songs about things being in the groovie).

So, if you want to continue reading this blog, you will need to leave a comment and include your email address. Or, if you prefer, you can send me a request via email to msolinger@hotmail.com. Please don't be shy! I love having readers. This blog will go private in one week.

Everyone Needs a Good, Smart Bear

Last weekend, we went to the Great Smoky Mountains National Park. We rented a huge chalet at the top of a mountain in Gatlinburg and just chillaxed.



When I was little, my parents took me and my brothers there for a vacation or two, and my older brother Brian has been taking his family there for the past several years. My parents eventually started going with them too. Last year, Stan and I and my younger brother Jason and his girlfriend Hailey went too. This year, Stan's mom and dad (Cookie & Norm) came too! So, we had twelve people. And two bears.

The first bear arrived in a very non-traditional way. My dad discovered that the chalet next door was uninhabited and that we could get onto its porch. He also discovered that the view from the chalet next door was a million times better than our view, so he called everybody over.

As we were standing on the other chalet's deck, a bear WALKED OUT ONTO THE DECK OF OUR CHALET!!! My nephew Rider saw him first and started screaming and lunging and pointing and running and basically having a panic attack. "There's a bear! He's on our porch! He just came out the door over there!" And, we're all like, "What bear? I didn't see a bear?" And he's like, "It wasn't a bear, it was a bear in a costume. I mean, it was a man in a bear costume!" Apparantly, some kind of psycho in a bear costume had taken over our chalet during our short absence!

So, we sent over my dad and Brian to find out what was going on. They emerged onto the deck and the bear seemed to be long gone. Then, the bear came out of the door too and ATTACKED THEM!! Dad and Brian fought back and wrestled that bear and basically scared him away!





We all ran back over to our chalet and Dad and Brian said that he ran out of the chalet and took off up the road. So, Rider and my other nephew Wyatt (ages 9 & 11) walked up the road a little bit to see if they could catch a glimpse of him running away.

In the meantime, the adults returned to our chalet's porch and the bear (who had not run up the road but had been hiding in the chalet) joined us. He asked for a beer, and we gave him a Bud Light. He took a seat in a rocking chair next to the hot tub.



Ok, so it was Stan in a bear costume.

And the boys thought it was a pretty good stunt. Later, Rider dressed up in the bear costume and stood in the driveway waving at cars going by. A few of them stopped to take a picture.





Later that day we drove into the park for sightseeing and a picnic.

The park is home to 1,500 black bears. That means that, on average, there are two bears for every 1 square mile. A lot of people see real bears during their trip. Stan and his mom saw two different bears as we were driving through the park. We were driving fast, and they only caught a glimpse. I was very jealous.







But, later that night, I was the first to spot a bear walking directly below the deck of our chalet. He wasn't the least bit afraid of us. He even stopped, sat down, and looked at us for a while.

It's true. Everyone needs a good, smart bear.

Olympics

You just HAVE to go to this blog and read the post entitled "The Olympics." You'll have to scroll down a little bit to see it. I just adore this little girl. She is so dang cute!

The OTHER Blog

Most of you already know this, but for those of you who don't ...

Stan and I are pursuing two adoptions -- one from China (4 years away) and one from Kazakhstan, which we hope to complete by the end of this year or early 2009. I have another blog all about the Kaz adoption. Up until now, the Kaz blog was invitation-only. It's now available to all readers.

You can link to it here or you can find a permanent link over to the right on the side bar. If you're going there for the first time, go to the bottom and read your way up the page.

I Want to Rock N Roll All Night

Last night, our whole fam damily went to see a Kiss tribute band called Mr. Speed. My nephews LOVE this band and have seen them four times in the past six weeks!

During that time, they've been developing some very interesting skills! My brother Brian says that they are turning into little Kiss Monsters.

This was taken right before the show started. We were all so excited!!

I think Gene Simmons is their new hero. When I took this picture, my mom was standing right next to me clapping and grinning ear-to-ear.

These guys are really fantastic. They are Cleveland-based, but they get requests to play shows all over. I work with Ace's wife! (His real name is Joe.)

Wyatt and Rider are totally digging this rock n' roll. These kids are so passionate about the things they love. They know every word to every Kiss song. They stood in front of that stage and focused every bit of their energy on the band for a full two hours.

Five Year Anniversary!

Tony's is our favorite Athens bar.

Stan asked me to marry him in this very booth in August of 2002. We were married five years ago this weekend!

What a weekend! First, we went to Columbus and visited our family. We had a great lunch with Henry and then spent some time reading a really cool children's book about the human body -- complete with x-ray like pictures of the heart and the lungs and the skull!

Then, we went to the Franz's annual Fourth of July Bash where we met little Ila for the first time! She is a totally awesome baby. She was so good and so happy. We really got a kick out of her.

On Saturday, we drove to Zanesville to pick up Jenny and then we all drove to Athens for the day. This weekend marks our fifth wedding anniversary, and Athens is where we met and also where Stan proposed, so we thought it would be a great time to visit the town. We miss Athens so much!! It's too much to explain in a post, but we love Athens very deeply. And not just because of the party atmosphere. Athens is so much more than that! There is just something very special about that little town tucked away in the hills of Southeastern Ohio. It's a magic place.

We walked around the uptown area and College Green. Then we stopped by The Pub for an aquarium (a fish-bowl-sized draft beer for only $2.50!) and then to Tony's for a $5 pitcher of Killian's. After that, we met up with our friends Jen and Carrie and ate dinner at Casa Nueva. Then it was back to Jen's house to CRASH after a very fun, hot, and excessive day!

I just thought this was funny.

Jenny is striking a pose.

American Woman statue behind the library.

Athens is quiet in the summer.

I miss everything about Athens -- even the ground!

I miss Athens rain, too!

Jenny ate a big pickle.



Our friends Jen & Carrie live in Athens. We are so envious!

Waiting for a Miracle

Annie (see below) has updated her blog a few times since she came home from Ethiopia with her daughter. After reading her posts, it is obvious that she has undergone a life-changing event. I am so touched by her words. And I have a hunch that words cannot really describe the mixture of emotions she feels right now.

I've been thinking a lot about what it means to adopt internationally. Above everything, I have to say that STAN AND I ARE THE LUCKY ONES. So many adoptive parents hear the comments, "She is such a lucky little girl!" or "It is so great that you are doing this." But, honestly, despite the ups and downs that Stan and I have faced, when all is said and done, we are the ones who are blessed. I know already that the adoption experience will be one of the greatest experiences of our lives.

I can't speak as a parent. I don't yet think that I can truly imagine the love and the full weight of parenthood, but I do feel like I can speak as an expectant mother. Growing up, I looked forward to someday being a mom. I thought this would entail pregnancy, a birth, nursing, and being a first-time mom to a newborn who would grow up and look like me and her father.

At first, it was very hard for me to accept that my adoption gestation would be a little different. And, please spare me the "Oh, you're so lucky to NOT have to be pregnant/give birth/nurse/raise a newborn" stuff. That kind of talk just pisses me off. As I have clearly documented (and could further document until the end of time without ever running out of things to say), adoption has its own breed of anguish, it's own closet of fears, and a very healthy dose of stress & worry. Otherwise, we would ALL adopt a kid or two, right? There is good and bad to both birth and adoption, and I think it is impossible to say which is "easier."

What I'm trying to say is that, despite the things I'm "missing out on," I am so extremely overjoyed to be embarking on this adventure! Lately, I have been thinking of all the things that Stan and I would be missing if we were entering parenthood via the usual fashion. These are things that we never even imagined when we first tossed around the idea of adoption.

The buzz word of all buzz words (at least during the last several years) is GLOBAL. One of the things I love most about Stan is that he has always been informed, and passionately so, of world politics and events. I never thought very much about the struggles of people in other countries, but he was always telling me stories about the Taliban and the Dalai Lama and genocide and refugees and all kinds of things LONG before we ever heard a whole lot about them on the news. When 9/11 happened, I already knew of the Taliban. Stan used to look up at me from a magazine and shake his fist in the air and say, "The Taliban, Michelle! They must be stopped!" And I thought that he was (possibly) overreacting. Many of us, myself included, had no idea what was going on outside of our own back yards.

Now how things have changed! When you start to comprehend that your future child lives in another part of the world, you definitely begin to think (and to love) without borders. Stan and I will not only travel to a foreign country, but we will actually bring home a human being from a far away land to live in our family forever! Our grandchildren (unless they, too, are adopted) will share our child's ethnic ancestry. This new ribbon will be forever woven into the fabric of our name. I would say that this is one of the most significant global experiences a person could have! Even when I thought about adoption in the past, I NEVER thought about this. And this would NOT be happening if everything had gone as planned. It is one of the miracles that comes along with international adoption.

Another thing that I am scared and excited about is this thought: My child's birth parents made a gut-wrenching decision to entrust the life of their baby to a stranger in the hope that this stranger could provide a better future than they could provide. And I am that stranger. I will think of this every single day of my life. Parenting is not easy, but this thought will be my inspiration and my fuel to do the very best that I can. All parents hold oaths of obligation and commitment in their hearts, but the promise that adoptive parents make is especially sacred. Somewhere, in the world, is a woman who will forever hope that she made the right choice, and I must work hard to ensure that her hopes come true.

Another adoption phenomenon takes place when parents meet their child for the first time. It is every bit as exciting and emotional as a live birth. Have you ever watched the show Adoption Stories on the Discovery Health Channel? We've seen nearly every episode, but we still tear-up every time the parent(s) and a little one finally come together for the first time. The same affirmation occurs over and over -- the affirmation that this is meant to be. The fact that men and women (most of them beaten down by infertility issues or singles who have decided that parenthood is a MUST in the series of events that create what we call life) decide upon adoption, travel half way around the world, meet people who do not speak their language, and receive into their arms a child who needs them just as much as they need her, is truly a miracle of undefined magnitude.

Maybe it's a good thing that we have spent so much time waiting. It takes a while to come to these realizations. At first, there was a part of me that wondered if adoption was really the right choice. Now, every day, it becomes abundantly clear to me that this is one of the best decisions we've ever made.

Happy News in MY Adoption Community

One of my adoption buddies traveled to Ethiopia yesterday, and met her daughter for the first time today. Little Maya is absolutely beautiful, and you can read all about her story here. Annie hasn't posted since she left, but I'm sure that she is over the moon.

Another friend who is adopting from Kazakhstan found out yesterday that she will soon travel to Esik, a region of Kazakhstan near the city of Almaty.

It's so great to know that people actually still do work their way through this process and come home with babies!!

Sad News in the Adoption Community

Please say a prayer for the family of Grammy-winner Steven Curtis Chapman. His youngest daughter who was adopted from China died after a tragic accident at their home. You can read more about it here. I am not really a fan of his music, but as soon as we started looking at China for adoption, we learned of his outspoken advocacy of international adoption and his missionary work in China's orphanages.

One of the adoption agencies we "courted" sent us a DVD about adoption, and Steven and his family were the primary focus of the short documentary. Just like every adoption story we have ever witnessed, it touched our hearts. It was obvious that adoption changed his life and that his world revolves around his family. Watching something so personal and so intimate makes you feel like you know them, and today's news has been harder to take than I would have imagined.

Steven and his wife, Mary Beth, co-authored the book pictured above. Click here to learn more about the book or click here to see pictures of the Chapman family and learn about all the work they have done around the world for the benefit of orphaned children.

Spring has Sprung

West Side Market Photos from Crawfishpie on Flickr

I'm still here! First, let me say THANK YOU to everyone who bought a cookbook (or ten). We are completely shocked that they sold so fast! You guys are awesome.

Spring has finally arrived, and there is so much more to do besides blog. I have found it difficult to sit down and write. One weekend, I had planned on a post-o-rama, and then I went out with friends and drank a bottle of wine, a glass of vodka, and three shots. WHAT was I thinking? I was seriously ill for a full 36 hours.

Immediately thereafter, I came down with a nasty cold/cough and remained sick for a week! After that finally went away, I felt so good that I basically abandoned all computer-related tasks except for blog-stalking. And let me tell you, everyone has been in a blog slump. No one is posting, so I don't feel so bad.

Other things I've been doing ...

... I watched the HBO mini-series "John Adams." I thought it was put together very well. I did get a little bit irked with him during the presidency episode. Thank goodness he came to his senses in his older age. I found Thomas Jefferson very interesting and would REALLY like to see a series about him.

... We're watching yet another season of Survivor. We like this show even though it's "so reality." Can you believe that Erik gave away the immunity idol?

... I'm also watching Lost. And we're all still lost. That show is so SLOW.

... I'm obsessed with the West Side Market. Last week I bought the following items for only $45: 6 pints of strawberries, a loaf of Italian bread, a canister of Hungarian paprika, 5 oranges the size of your head, 1 pound of green beans, 1 head of lettuce, 6 Yukon gold potatoes, 6 plum tomatoes, 2 cookies, 4 handmade Italian sausages, 2 peppers, 1 Russian tea biscuit, 2 Hungarian garlic kolbas, 2 chocolate treats, 2 Vidalia onions, 1 pound of mushrooms, 2 bunches of bananas, 1 cucumber, and a partridge in a pear tree.

... I'm reading My Father's House: A Life of Adoption by David Jones. He is adopted, and he proposes that all interpersonal commitments (biological and otherwise) are adoptions. He says that even biological parents must "adopt" their children, and by making that commitment, truly enter into parenthood. Marriage, too, is an adoption of sorts, as is genuine friendship.

The Cookbooks Are Here -- SOLD OUT

Updated Update: SOLD OUT!! Yay!! Thank you everybody!!

Update: Even though there aren't very many comments, we have almost sold all 200 copies that we ordered!!! There are a handful left, and we need to get them outta here, so just let me know if you want one. Thanks everybody!





The cookbooks are here!



Description ...

• Over 100 tried-and-true recipes submitted by our friends & family.


• Includes favorites such as Judy's Taco Dip; JP's New Doodley, Toodley, Pina Tequiladas; Stan's Jambalaya; Ardra's Kick Ass Bolognese; and Alison's Banana Spice Cookies with Icing.


• Even if you did not actively contribute a recipe, you may be surpised to see your recipe in the book. If you've ever given me a good recipe or made me a good treat, you might be a contributing chef!


• Proceeds will go toward our adoption. If something goes wrong and the adoption does not take place, the proceeds will be donated to a children's charity.


• Designed as a celebration of family, the cookbook is a great gift idea for Mother's Day.


• Convenient pick-up locations in Cleveland, Columbus, Mt. Gilead, and Mansfield.


• Commit now and pay later! Deferred payment available.


• For a limited time, free shipping available to our out-of-state friends!


• Buy an extra for your co-worker, relative, or foodie friend!


• Cost is a low $10.

Email me at msolinger@hotmail.com or leave a comment to place your order.

Happy Birthday Alex!!

This Christmas. Grandma, Grandpa, Alex, Wyatt, Rider.

Alex is my one and only niece. This past week, she celebrated her 21st birthday.

So, what can I tell you about Alex? I have a lot of funny memories where Alex is concerned. I'll give you the short version of a few. Once, my dad (her grandpa) ran her over with a wheelbarrow. (This is par for the course in my family. My mom was once ran over by a bed, and my brother was ran over by a hay wagon.) That same weekend, she spent a lot of time digging for treasure (quarters) in our garden and telling our elderly neighbor that she "couldn't see a thing" without Grandma's ruby red reading glasses. On another weekend, it was a game to see how many fried eggs she could eat. (Maybe the best thing about this was that Grandma obliged, and I kept saying, "Are you sure she should eat MORE eggs?!")

The first time I ever laid eyes on her was when she ran into my room (at age 3 or 4), grabbed a lipstick and ran away with it! For a few years, Alex loved to play games like Connect Four or Tic Tac Toe but ONLY if we played for money. When I got married, Alex was a bridesmaid in the wedding. She was the one who came to me at the reception, tears streaming down her face, saying, "Oh my God! They're spanking Grandpa! It's the funniest thing I've ever seen!" If it weren't for her, I'm sure I would have missed seeing two of my African American lady friends spanking my dad's backside (in unison) on the dance floor.

Happy 21st, Alex! I hope you enjoy it -- it only comes once in a lifetime. I had a lot of fun on my 21st birthday. I was a student at OU, and my housemates and I threw a huge keg party complete with an in-house band. Our living room was transformed into a stage/dance floor and everyone rocked out in full 90s style. Along with just about everybody we knew, there were scores of people whom we did not know but simply showed up because there was a great party going on. I'm sure that cops came, as they always did, but it was cool. We just told them we'd do whatever it was they were asking us to do. And everyone had a great time. (At least, this is what I believe happened on my 21st birthday. I have been known to mix all of my party weekends together. Brain cells were lost along the way.)

The next day we went to our favorite bar (Tony's) and I did a shot with the bar owner (Tony) to celebrate my 21st birthday. (We had been drinking there for a few years, so it was a little bit awkward to tell Tony that I was turning 21 -- after he and his staff had served alcoholic beverages to me for so long! But on the other hand, he could celebrate the fact that I had made it to the other side and could now be counted among the legitimately "of age" regulars at his bar. I'm sure I wasn't the only one to do a 21st birthday shot with Tony.)

Anyway, happy birthday Alex!!! We love ya!!

Esther is a Pooper and She Smells Like Cottage Cheese

Esther (aka Boober, aka Stinky Moe, aka Pooper) is the best cat who ever lived. Like most cats, she is furry and speaks in meows. But in many ways, Esther is different than the rest. For example, she sleeps in the bed with us under the covers and stays there all night until "the family" gets up in the morning. When we come home from work, she is waiting at the door to greet us. When we eat dinner, she sits on a chair at the table (waiting patiently -- or not so patiently, depending on the fare -- for a bite).

When we sit on the couch and watch TV, she climbs onto one of our laps and falls into a deep and laid-back sleep until it's time to go to bed, which she knows is ten-ish. If we stay up past our bedtime, she has been known to stand at the bedroom door and meow until we join her. On the weekend, she seems to accept that we stay up past ten, and retires to the bedroom on her own (at ten o'clock).

Esther goes outside under semi-supervision. She knows where her yard begins and ends. She's usually pretty good about staying in her own yard, as long as she knows we are watching her. She acts up every now and then. For example, if we have people over to our house and we are not babying her as we usually do, she will climb onto the top of our piano (stepping on a few low octave keys on her way up) and then stare into the corner and howl. This means that she is ready for everyone to go home and for Mommy and Daddy to shower her with affection. This is about has unruly as she gets.

Once, when we were away on vacation, her caretakers accidentally closed and locked the kitchen door (the door that goes to the basement and to her litter box). It was about 24 hours before the problem was discovered/fixed, but to everyone's surprise, it appeared as if Esther had left no "surprises" in the house.

When we came home from our trip, we did find one spot where Esther had relieved herself. The poor dear must have scoured the house for the best possible place to do her thing, and (other than the toilet) we couldn't have chosen a better spot ourselves. She found a wadded up old towel in the back of a closet and that is where she decided to pee. All we had to do was throw away the towel. Now, if you don't have any pets, this may not sound too impressive. Most pet owners in this situation, however, would come home to Zoo Central on the living room floor. A lot of pet owners, in fact, come home to Zoo Central on the living floor even when their pet was given plenty of access to proper potty places.

Esther loves me and Stan both, but she is definitely Daddy's Little Girl. Stan has made up a library of songs in Esther's honor. Here are a few. (Keep in mind that the lyrics were chosen mainly for humor and rhyming effect -- not for accuracy of content.)

Her name is Esther,
She is a kitty,
And she smells like cottage cheese.

Her name is Esther,
She is so shitty,
And she's so damn hard to please.

***

Rub-a-dub-dub,
Put Esther in the tub
And mix her up with some applesauce.

The Journey of a Year

One of the blogs I like to read is 3 Peanuts. I started following this blog about a year ago, when we first thought about adoption. Little Kate is so adorable, and her mom is a very creative and classy blogger.

April 4 marked the one year anniversary of Kate's homecoming from China, and her mom put together a terrific commemoration video. Please go watch it here. Be sure to turn on the volume.

Happy Birthday Brian!

Happy Birthday in Chinese

First, let me say that I never should have started this birthday stuff because every time I turn around it's either someone's birthday or it WAS someone's birthday and I forgot it or it WAS someone's birthday and I didn't forget it, but I never blogged about it either. The latter is the case when it comes to Brian. I remembered his birthday and reminded myself each day for two weeks to blog it. Nevermind that after the first week, his birthday was over!

Brian is my big brother, and I have always looked up to him. He is ten years older than me, so when I was three, he was thirteen. I remember being three years old and how I would take a bath every night and then put on my night gown. After bath time, it was TV time for the family. I remember walking into the family room, all washed and pretty and gowned, and Dad and Brian would whistle at me until I blushed. Then they would fart until the room was unbearable. It was great fun. Now Brian is a dad himself, and I can assure you that his two sons would act the same way if they were blessed with a baby sister.

Happy Birthday big brother!

Easter 2008

Conversation between my 4-year-old nephew Henry and his mom at church on Easter Sunday during communion ...

Henry (watching the priest administer communion): I want some of those chips.

Ardra: You can't have any, Honey. You have to be a certain age.

Henry: Why do I have to be a certain age? Are they spicy chips?


Later in the van after church ...

Grandma Cookie: So, I told Henry that, yes, Jesus is in our hearts. His spirit and his kindness and his joy.

Henry: Grandma, is that kind of like the FORCE in Star Wars?

Everyone: YES!! It is kind of like that.

Henry: But the FORCE is stronger, right uncle Eric (Stan)?

Uncle Eric (Stan): That's RIGHT Henry.

Harvey is For Real

Did you ever watch that old classic movie with Jimmy Stewart and the human-sized, imaginary rabbit? I LOVE that movie. If you ever watch it, make sure you pay attention. The humor is very subtle.

Well, this is no pooka. This is a REAL rabbit. I snopes'd it and everything. Look at those feet!! Imagine if you saw this guy hopping down the bunny trail?

Happy Birthday, Jenny!

This is a picture of Jen getting her hair done for my wedding. We all just looked so cute that day! Jen's birthday was on Sunday. What can I tell you about Jen? She's one of the funnest people I know. She makes a killer margarita, and she has a heart as big as the moon.

We were in the same preschool together, but I don't remember her so much from that year. I do remember the next year (Kindergarten) when she barfed Hamburger Helper all over her desk. That's my earliest memory of Jen.

My second memory was also from Kindergarten. Jen, Penny Watson and I had a lunch date! We met at Jen's house and ate some kind of lunch (it was not, to my relief, Hamburger Helper).

I don't remember anything else about it except that sometime either before or after this, I asked my mom/dad if they would call Penny Watson's mom/dad for something (I don't remember what) and they said I COULD CALL PENNY MYSELF! I specifically remember calling her from the rotary phone in our wallpapered kitchen on Scotland Boulevard and thinking I had hit the big time now -- calling people MYSELF. It was a milestone.

Anyway, HAPPY BIRTHDAY JEN!! We love ya!!

Last Saturday's View

My Latest Obsession

These are red-tailed hawks. You Ohioans may not realize this, but they are abundant in our area and are sitting in trees just like this all the time right out there in front of our noses and we don't see them. I don't know when it started, but sometime in the last few years, I started watching for them on our numerous trips up and down I-71. I became pretty good at spotting them along the highway and would watch for them as a way to pass the time.

For some reason, I never really looked for them when I was just driving around town. Lately, I decided that I would start looking for them locally, and now I see one almost every time I go to or from work. It's getting kind of crazy. I mean, I'm looking up into the trees WHILE I'M DRIVING. Oh, and I've also been listening to a book on CD about vampires. So, driving is just a background activity. I've tried to stop looking for the birds, but I'm totally obsessed. I love these things. They are HUGE. They weigh three or four pounds, and when you see one, they appear to be even bigger than that. I particularly get excited when I see two together as shown in the picture above. I've only spotted a "pair" twice.

Does anyone else have this obsession?