Olympics

You just HAVE to go to this blog and read the post entitled "The Olympics." You'll have to scroll down a little bit to see it. I just adore this little girl. She is so dang cute!

Waiting for a Miracle

Annie (see below) has updated her blog a few times since she came home from Ethiopia with her daughter. After reading her posts, it is obvious that she has undergone a life-changing event. I am so touched by her words. And I have a hunch that words cannot really describe the mixture of emotions she feels right now.

I've been thinking a lot about what it means to adopt internationally. Above everything, I have to say that STAN AND I ARE THE LUCKY ONES. So many adoptive parents hear the comments, "She is such a lucky little girl!" or "It is so great that you are doing this." But, honestly, despite the ups and downs that Stan and I have faced, when all is said and done, we are the ones who are blessed. I know already that the adoption experience will be one of the greatest experiences of our lives.

I can't speak as a parent. I don't yet think that I can truly imagine the love and the full weight of parenthood, but I do feel like I can speak as an expectant mother. Growing up, I looked forward to someday being a mom. I thought this would entail pregnancy, a birth, nursing, and being a first-time mom to a newborn who would grow up and look like me and her father.

At first, it was very hard for me to accept that my adoption gestation would be a little different. And, please spare me the "Oh, you're so lucky to NOT have to be pregnant/give birth/nurse/raise a newborn" stuff. That kind of talk just pisses me off. As I have clearly documented (and could further document until the end of time without ever running out of things to say), adoption has its own breed of anguish, it's own closet of fears, and a very healthy dose of stress & worry. Otherwise, we would ALL adopt a kid or two, right? There is good and bad to both birth and adoption, and I think it is impossible to say which is "easier."

What I'm trying to say is that, despite the things I'm "missing out on," I am so extremely overjoyed to be embarking on this adventure! Lately, I have been thinking of all the things that Stan and I would be missing if we were entering parenthood via the usual fashion. These are things that we never even imagined when we first tossed around the idea of adoption.

The buzz word of all buzz words (at least during the last several years) is GLOBAL. One of the things I love most about Stan is that he has always been informed, and passionately so, of world politics and events. I never thought very much about the struggles of people in other countries, but he was always telling me stories about the Taliban and the Dalai Lama and genocide and refugees and all kinds of things LONG before we ever heard a whole lot about them on the news. When 9/11 happened, I already knew of the Taliban. Stan used to look up at me from a magazine and shake his fist in the air and say, "The Taliban, Michelle! They must be stopped!" And I thought that he was (possibly) overreacting. Many of us, myself included, had no idea what was going on outside of our own back yards.

Now how things have changed! When you start to comprehend that your future child lives in another part of the world, you definitely begin to think (and to love) without borders. Stan and I will not only travel to a foreign country, but we will actually bring home a human being from a far away land to live in our family forever! Our grandchildren (unless they, too, are adopted) will share our child's ethnic ancestry. This new ribbon will be forever woven into the fabric of our name. I would say that this is one of the most significant global experiences a person could have! Even when I thought about adoption in the past, I NEVER thought about this. And this would NOT be happening if everything had gone as planned. It is one of the miracles that comes along with international adoption.

Another thing that I am scared and excited about is this thought: My child's birth parents made a gut-wrenching decision to entrust the life of their baby to a stranger in the hope that this stranger could provide a better future than they could provide. And I am that stranger. I will think of this every single day of my life. Parenting is not easy, but this thought will be my inspiration and my fuel to do the very best that I can. All parents hold oaths of obligation and commitment in their hearts, but the promise that adoptive parents make is especially sacred. Somewhere, in the world, is a woman who will forever hope that she made the right choice, and I must work hard to ensure that her hopes come true.

Another adoption phenomenon takes place when parents meet their child for the first time. It is every bit as exciting and emotional as a live birth. Have you ever watched the show Adoption Stories on the Discovery Health Channel? We've seen nearly every episode, but we still tear-up every time the parent(s) and a little one finally come together for the first time. The same affirmation occurs over and over -- the affirmation that this is meant to be. The fact that men and women (most of them beaten down by infertility issues or singles who have decided that parenthood is a MUST in the series of events that create what we call life) decide upon adoption, travel half way around the world, meet people who do not speak their language, and receive into their arms a child who needs them just as much as they need her, is truly a miracle of undefined magnitude.

Maybe it's a good thing that we have spent so much time waiting. It takes a while to come to these realizations. At first, there was a part of me that wondered if adoption was really the right choice. Now, every day, it becomes abundantly clear to me that this is one of the best decisions we've ever made.

Happy New Year (of the Rat)

Happy Chinese New Year!

I'm a rat. And so are you if you were born in the year 2008, 1996, 1984, 1972, 1960, 1948, 1936, 1924, or 1912. This is our year!

Rats are perfectionists. They communicate extremely well, are quick-witted, level headed and always alert. They choose their friends carefully and dote on children. Rats are great strategists and make good politicians, but most importantly, their intuition enables them to suss out the enemy quite early in the game. Rats are shrewd and know how to amass wealth. They’ll gladly spend on their loved ones while outsiders will find them miserly. Their adaptability and clever manoeuvring will see them thumbing their nose at even the tightest spot. But they can be quick-tempered and overly critical, making them edgy, nervous and a downright nag with things don’t go their way. They have an opportunistic trait that will see them wheeling and dealing in exploiting situations for self-benefit.

Famous people born in the Year Of The Rat:
Antonio Banderas, Antonio Moreno, Ben Affleck, Bobby Avila, Burt Reynolds, Cameron Diaz, Carlos Delgado, Churchill, Colin Firth,Doris Day, Englebert Humperdinck, Fernando Valenzuela, Hector Elizondo, Hugh Grant, Juanes, Jude Law, Julianne Moore, Justina Machado, Kathy Bates, Kenny Loggins, Marlon Brando, Mozart, Pedro Armendáriz, President George Washington, Ron Moody, Samuel J Jackson, Sean Penn, Shakespeare, Timothy Hutton, Truman Capote, Ursula Andress, and Xavier Cugat

The Chinese zodiac signs are determined by the lunar year in which you were born. The Chinese believe the animal ruling one's birth year has a profound influence on personality, and destiny. The saying is: "This animal hides in your heart."

Ni Hao, Kai-lan!

If you have kids in the cartoon-watching age group, here's one that sounds pretty cool. It's premiering on Nick Jr. You can read more about it here. The name of the show is "Ni Hao, Kai-lan." Ni hao means hello in Chinese. The web page on Nick Jr. says that the show is a "play-along, think-along series" infused with Chinese language and culture. "Ni Hao, Kai-lan reinforces the idea that being bicultural and bilingual is being American." The premier airs Thursday February 7 at 11:00 a.m.

Thank God for Brangelina

This Thanksgiving, I am thankful for Brad and Angelina. Yeah, that's right. Brad and Angelina. I'm only going to say this once, and I want all of you to listen closely. I don't know if Angelina got special treatment in receiving her children, but if she did, she certainly deserved it.

Before adopting three children internationally (from Cambodia, Ethiopia, and Vietnam), Ms. Jolie had already devoted herself to the worldwide humanitarian crisis. In her life, she has traveled to and assisted the people of Cambodia, Sierra Leone, Tanzania, Pakistan, Thailand, Ecuador, Kosovo, Kenya, Namibia, Sri Lanka, Russia, Jordan, Egypt, Haiti, India, New Delhi, Chad, Syria, and Iraq.

She has served as a Goodwill Ambassador for the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees. (The UNHCR protects refugees and assists in their return or resettlement.) She was the first recipient of the Citizen of the World Award, and she was also presented with the Global Humanitarian Award as well as a membership to the Council on Foreign Relations.

She and Brad Pitt have devoted time, energy, and oodles of money to global causes. They have used their fame to bring attention and aid to people around the world.

This touches me because, as a fellow adoptive mom-to-be, it is becoming very clear to me how fortunate and lucky we are. My daughter will live for one year in an orphanage. She will most likely receive her first bath the night after she is placed in our arms. Her "first picture" will be her referral picture sent to us prior to travel. In it, she will look like a little boy. Her hair will be cut very short to minimize head lice. She will most likely be wearing a heavy winter coat to keep her warm as the orphanage is very minimally heated. Many times, food will not come when she is hungry, but only at the regularly scheduled feeding time.

Since we have started this journey, we have learned a lot about the world beyond the U.S. We are still novices, as there is so much to learn, but we are realizing that our world view is very warped. For example, did you know that if you own your home, have a car, pay your bills, and send your children to college, you are part of the wealthiest 2% of the world population? Think about this the next time you are watching television and you are bombarded with advertisements for SUVs, diamond rings, and electronic gadgets.

A REAL world view is shown below.*

If we could reduce the world's population to a village of precisely 100 people, with all existing human ratios remaining the same, the demographics would look something like this:

The village would have 60 Asians, 14 Africans, 12 Europeans, 8 Latin Americans, 5 from the USA and Canada, and 1 from the South Pacific.

51 would be male; 49 would be female.

82 would be non-white; 18 white.

67 would be non-Christian; 33 would be Christian.

80 would live in substandard housing.

67 would be unable to read.

50 would be malnourished and 1 dying of starvation.

33 would be without access to a safe water supply.

39 would lack access to improved sanitation.

24 would not have any electricity; of the 76 that do have electricity, most would only use it for light at night.

7 people would have access to the internet.

1 would have a college education.

1 would have HIV.

2 would be near birth; 1 near death.

5 would control 32% of the entire world's wealth; all 5 would be U.S. citizens.

33 would be receiving -- and attempting to live on -- only 3% of the income of "the village."

*The original version of the State of the Village Report by Donella H. Meadows was published in 1990 as "Who Lives in the Global Village?" and updated in 2005. With so many new reports and constantly changing statistics, please view the above presentation as general and not meant to be totally accurate. It is more for the purpose of fostering understanding, so that we might better dialogue and understand the different cultures of our world.