Our Trip to Georgia

SAVANNAH -- Have you ever been to Savannah? If not, you should put it on your to-do list. It is beautiful. And fun. And historical. And there is a lot of good food -- my favorites being she-crab soup and pecan pralines.

ALISON -- Alison told me to go to Savannah. She's also the one who told me to start a blog. And to go with her to OU. I guess you could say she's a good influence! Last week, she posted about Many Moons Wait on her blog, Aliblog (see blogs I like), and said some really nice things about me. Alison and I have known each other since elementary school. We were brownies together, and then we walked over this bridge and they said we were Girl Scouts. What was that all about? I think they gave us wings, too, or something like that. As it turns out, Savannah is the home of the founder of the Girl Scouts, Juliette Gordon Low.

SARAH -- Another Girl Scout we all know and love is Sarah. She has a blog too, called Sarah and the Good Squad (see blogs I like). Sarah's mom, Alison's mom, and my mom were all Girl Scout leaders or co-leaders at one point or another. We were not your typical Girl Scout troop. And our moms were not your typical troop leaders. The most Girl-Scoutish thing I remember doing is having a talent show at the Girl Scout camp and my group sang, "In the Groovie," a lovely song about knowing what you want and getting it:

I want a cheese

I want a cheeseburger

Not too cheesy

Not too burgery

But in the groovie, in the groovie

I want some French

I want some French fries

Not too Frenchie

Not too fryie

But in the groovie, in the groovie

I want a milk

I want a milk shake

Not to milky

Not too shaky

But in the groovie, in the groovie

If you don't like it

You can kiss my butt

Not on the left

Not on the right

But in the groovie, in the groovie

Did I mention how classy and polite people are in the south? But I digress.

AMBIVABLOG -- After Alison published her very flattering post about me, her friend Annie (a.k.a. Amba) came over to Many Moons Wait and was so impressed with my ultrasound that she went back to her blog (Ambivablog -- see blogs I like) and wrote about it. I have to admit to everyone that I did not create that myself. I saw it somewhere else and -- um -- borrowed it. I seriously doubt that whomever I stole it from made it up herself, because I've seen it on many adoption blogs. But, I feel obligated now to write something really good someday because Annie is reading. She is a "real" writer (as are Alison and Sarah), and has a blog of her own called Ambivablog. I like her because she is a true cat lover. I know that she loves cats deeply because of the way she describes their eyelashes and eyeliner.

THE CHRONICLER -- Myers also read Alison's post, and he left a comment on her blog about how I used to be called the Chronicler. I had forgotten all about this name, bequeathed to me by Dave (or Dah-veed as his Spanish friend calls him, as in, "Dah-veed, this vulture it stinks like sheeeeet.") Dave named me the Chronicler because for one quarter at OU, I took a little notebook everywhere I went and logged the events of the season. It had to be done. Someone had to do it. Strange and wondrous things seemed to happen at all times of the day and night. Things that no one would ever believe. Truth is stranger than fiction, and all that shit. Myers went to elementary school with Stan and also to OU with Stan. He is sort of Stan's Alison.

SCOTT -- So, the reason we went to Savannah was because we were invited to a wedding in Atlanta. Our OU friend, Scott, finally found the girl of his dreams (Jennette) and they became husband and wife this past Saturday, 67 years to the day that Scott's grandfather and grandmother (Frank & Rita) were married. Strangely enough, Frank & Rita were chronicled by the Chronicler in "the book" because a group of us OU kids happened to visit them in their Newton, New Jersey home on the morning of New Year's Eve 1995. Frank offered us bourbon, and Rita tried to tell him that nice girls like us didn't drink, but Frank knew better than that. There were boys in the room, too, but Frank was only interested in Scott's female friends. Frank immigrated to the U.S. from Italy and accidentally took the train to Newton. He was trying to get to Booton, but the Italian accent caused him to be pointed in the wrong direction.

So, to conclude this monstrous post, allow me to chronical a few of the things from our trip to Georgia:

We met the self-proclaimed blackest white-bread girl to ever belong to Alpha Kappa Smelta (or something like that).

Stan drank a mixture of Call a Cab and Attitude Adjustment at Wet Willie's on the river. It totally adjusted his attitude, but we didn't have to call a cab.

The all-male, father-son dance was not going well. "We looked like a bunch of sausages out there," said Dave. So, naturally, he started a Congo line.

After eating at Paula Dean's restaurant, Stan went to bed and dreamed of fried chicken all night long.

Champagne Duane leaves the Holiday Inn Express, but he ALWAYS comes back.

It's the same story the crow told me/ it's the only one he know ~ Robert Hunter, "Uncle John's Band"

Photo by Pandiyan, Flicker.com

I love crows. Or blackbirds. Or anything that looks like this. They are spooky but elegant. Dark but beautiful.

Did you know that a group of crows is called a murder of crows? And did you know that crows are thought to be the keepers of sacred law, invisible forces, and magic? They are also thought to be shape-shifters, capable of altering their own reality.

Crows have been observed to hold "court" where they gather into very large groups and seem to pass judgement against one or more of their members. These tribunals can last for days, and often end in capital punishment of the accused.

It's Monday and Everything Stinks

Well, the Indians blew it and life goes back to normal here in Cleveland. No more late nights trying to BELIEVE. No more wishing the radio was in sync with the television so as to avoid the Boston-loving-bastards at Fox. No more Big Poppy spitting into his gloved hands and smacking them together like patty cake. No more rally towels. No more bull pen percussion ensembles. And no more pies.

Today I just feel let down. The Indians are done, and the word TRIBE makes me want to hurl. It seems as if the Browns will never be any good. The Cavs might be good this year, but I feel sour towards LeBron. All of this will heal with time, and then we'll have our hearts broken again.

On a brighter note, my husband just helped the police track down the latest "violator" on our street. For safety reasons, I won't go into detail, but it was a traffic incident in front of our house and Stan got to ride in the sqad car and everything! I just love this neighborhood.

Happy Birthday, Dad

Happy birthday, Dad! Most of you already know Mr. Ed, but if you don't, these pictures will give you a pretty good idea of what kind of guy he is. The picture above was taken at Siesta Key Beach in Florida. Every Sunday night at sunset, you can catch a groovy drum circle complete with drums, dancing, inscense, ex-hippies, new age healers, and plenty of onlookers -- young and old alike. My parents LOVE to attend this weekly event when they are in Florida. In this picture, they are posing with Papa Love (or something like that -- I forget his name).


The pictures below are from an Indians game in the 90s. Believe it or not, my dad is now an usher for the Cleveland Indians and has been entrusted to prevent or punish behaviors such as this!


GO TRIBE!!

The Witching Hour

I saw this picture on another blog, and I just had to share it with you guys. I love Hillary, but this is F to the U to the N-N-Y. And just in time for Halloween.

Happy Birthday, Hailey

Ok, so we have a lot of October birthdays in my family. Tomorrow is Hailey's birthday! Hailey is my brother's girlfriend, but she really deserves a better title than that. You see, she has dated and lived with my brother for at least four years. They aren't officially engaged yet, so I can't say that she is my brother's fiance, but I think it's safe to say that she is my future sister-in-law. Hailey is a ray of sunshine. I don't think I can remember her ever being in a bad mood. She is also a big Indians fan, and I'm sure she will celebrate big time tomorrow at Jacob's Field. Happy birthday, Hailey, and GO TRIBE!!

Happy Birthday, Ardra

Stan’s parents were here for a visit this weekend, and while the guys worked on a home improvement project, Cookie and I went to the zoo with Henry. Henry is my four-year-old nephew. He likes all the animals except for the gorillas. He had a bad experience with a gorilla during a prior trip to the zoo. The gorilla ran up and pounded on the window, scaring everyone. Apparently, he is not the only one with Gorilla Fear. When we came upon the gorilla exhibit yesterday, we saw a toddler lying on the ground, screaming and clutching his mother’s ankle as she dragged him across the ground toward the gorilla area. I wonder what the gorillas think about us.

This is a picture of Henry with his “mummy” (Stan’s sister Ardra). Yesterday was Ardra’s birthday, and she was on a business trip. Ardra is a great sister-in-law. She was very supportive when we found out about the fertility issues, and she wrote a terrific letter of recommendation to our adoption agency when we started this new journey. Happy birthday, Ardra!! We missed you yesterday!!

Here's the Scoop!!

We're pregant! Well, not really. The baby won't be here until about two years from now. But we already know that she will probably be a girl with brown eyes and brown hair. We are very proud and pleased to announce that we are adopting from China!

We learned in February that I have endometriosis and that my fallopian tubes do not receive eggs from my ovaries. If the eggs cannot get into the tubes, there is simply no way to conceive. The doctors told us that Invetro Fertilization (IVF) would be our only real option for pregnancy. IVF means that eggs are harvested from the mother and fertilized with sperm from the father in a laboratory setting. Once fertilized, the eggs are implanted into the mother's uterus. The procedure works for many couples, but many also suffer miscarriage. Additionally, endometriosis can take a toll on the quality of the eggs themselves, making IVF even more risky. The procedure costs $10,000, and many couples go through several rounds of IVF before they are successful. Insurance companies are not mandated to cover IVF for Ohio residents, and neither of our plans cover it.

We were devastated. We had already faced once-a-month failures for about two years, and we knew that spending $10,000 on the mere possibility of pregnancy was quite a risk to take, both financially and emotionally. Our reproductive endocrinologist (a Cleveland Clinic physician and a pioneering leader in IVF) would have supported us 100% if we chose IVF, but he also respected our decision to take a more sure-fire route to parenthood -- adoption.

We began the adoption process in May and have been working our butts off ever since, trying to get our paperwork to China as soon as possible. Our completed dossier left for Beijing on September 14, and China officially confirmed receipt of it on September 28. Now we wait many moons until we travel to China to meet our daughter. The approximate waiting time we have been given is two years. Our daughter will probably be 9-12 months old when we bring her home.

While we're waiting, I hope to use this blog as a way to keep friends & family updated on our progress and give everyone some information so that they will know more about the origins of their soon-to-be grandaughter, niece, cousin, or buddy. Also, this blog will keep me busy while I wait.

I'm so glad you're reading. Post a comment (don't be shy), and come back soon!!

Questions & Answers

I saw this great Q&A on another blog and thought it would be perfect for you guys, too. So, here are some questions you may have -- and my attempt to answer them.


Why are you adopting? We wanted to start a family, and the typical means by which to do so just didn't work out. We always said we wanted our first child to be a girl, and China has lots of them waiting for mommies and daddies.


Why China? It is quite overwhelming to choose from where to adopt. If you've never been in this situation, you really can't fathom the enormity of it. First, you must decide between domestic and international. If you choose international, you must then choose from the countries currently participating in international adoption with the United States. There are only a handful to choose from. Each country's program has its own variables: health of the babies, cost, number of trips to the country required of the adoptive parents, the length of stay required, length of wait for a child, predictability and accountability of its program, etc. To us, China seemed to be the best choice, and it was also our gut choice. Factor in the likelihood to receive a baby girl, and it was a done deal.


What is DTC, LID, Referral, TA, and what's with all the ladybugs???? Welcome to the Chinese Adoption Community. You'll need to know these words and phrases if you want to keep up, especially in the blogosphere.

DTC -- Dossier to China. This is the date that our massive pile o'paperwork was mailed to our adoption agency's office in China. For us, this date was September 14, 2007. A happy day indeed.

LID -- Log in Date. This is the date that the government agency in China overseeing international adoption (CCAA) formally confirmed receipt of our massive pile o'paperwork. It is the official start date of our long wait for referral. Other waiting families will share our same LID, and it is very likely that we will all travel to China round about the same time. Our LID was September 28, 2007. A VERY happy day indeed.

Referral -- The date (about two years from now) when we receive word from the CCAA on which little girl they have chosen for us. We will get a few photographs, some basic info such as her weight, her personality, how many teeth she has, etc.

TA -- Travel Approval. This happens about one month after referral. This is when you receive the green light to make your travel arrangements. The actual travel occurs about eight weeks after referral. We will spend 10-14 days in China. Our daughter will be given to us on day two, and from then on we are a FOREVER FAMILY.

Ladybugs -- Ladybugs are a symbol of good luck in many countries including China. In more recent years, they have also become a symbol for adoption from China. Superstition says that a ladybug sighting means that the referral is arriving soon.


Why are most of the waiting babies in China girls? This is sometimes hard to explain, so I'm sure I'll post on it again in the future, but here is a simplified explanation. In an effort to control a very real population crisis, the Chinese government limits most couples from having more than one child. It is the tradition in China that sons will care for their elderly parents. (There is no Social Security, 401K, or pension plan for most Chinese citizens.) The son takes care of his parents, and the daughter takes care of her husband's parents. As a result, there is a strong preference among Chinese couples to give birth to a boy. Although it is illegal to do so, many couples opt for abortion when they learn that their baby is a girl. It is also illegal to place a child for adoption, so there is simply no way to "choose" adoption. Of course it is also illegal to abandon a baby in China, but this happens to thousands of baby girls every year. Many of them do not survive. Some of them are found and placed in orphanages, and some of these are adopted. There are boys in the orphanages, too, but they are very outnumbered.