Henry is Turning 5!!

Henry is my nephew, and on Saturday he will be five years old!! I can hardly believe it. When Henry was a baby, he loved Cheerios more than anything in the world. If you simply showed him the Cheerios box, he would smile and TREMBLE from head to toe.



As he grew older, Henry shocked us all with his very quick ability to talk. One day he was pointing and grunting at everything (especially ceiling lights) and the next day he was saying things like AIR CONDITIONER.



Now Henry is a champion Karate expert and a skilled Jedi warrior. He is also a master tinker-toy architect and can sing every word of Cruella DeVille (from 101 Dalmations).

Happy Birthday, Henry!!!! We love you!!!

Everyone Needs a Good, Smart Bear

Last weekend, we went to the Great Smoky Mountains National Park. We rented a huge chalet at the top of a mountain in Gatlinburg and just chillaxed.



When I was little, my parents took me and my brothers there for a vacation or two, and my older brother Brian has been taking his family there for the past several years. My parents eventually started going with them too. Last year, Stan and I and my younger brother Jason and his girlfriend Hailey went too. This year, Stan's mom and dad (Cookie & Norm) came too! So, we had twelve people. And two bears.

The first bear arrived in a very non-traditional way. My dad discovered that the chalet next door was uninhabited and that we could get onto its porch. He also discovered that the view from the chalet next door was a million times better than our view, so he called everybody over.

As we were standing on the other chalet's deck, a bear WALKED OUT ONTO THE DECK OF OUR CHALET!!! My nephew Rider saw him first and started screaming and lunging and pointing and running and basically having a panic attack. "There's a bear! He's on our porch! He just came out the door over there!" And, we're all like, "What bear? I didn't see a bear?" And he's like, "It wasn't a bear, it was a bear in a costume. I mean, it was a man in a bear costume!" Apparantly, some kind of psycho in a bear costume had taken over our chalet during our short absence!

So, we sent over my dad and Brian to find out what was going on. They emerged onto the deck and the bear seemed to be long gone. Then, the bear came out of the door too and ATTACKED THEM!! Dad and Brian fought back and wrestled that bear and basically scared him away!





We all ran back over to our chalet and Dad and Brian said that he ran out of the chalet and took off up the road. So, Rider and my other nephew Wyatt (ages 9 & 11) walked up the road a little bit to see if they could catch a glimpse of him running away.

In the meantime, the adults returned to our chalet's porch and the bear (who had not run up the road but had been hiding in the chalet) joined us. He asked for a beer, and we gave him a Bud Light. He took a seat in a rocking chair next to the hot tub.



Ok, so it was Stan in a bear costume.

And the boys thought it was a pretty good stunt. Later, Rider dressed up in the bear costume and stood in the driveway waving at cars going by. A few of them stopped to take a picture.





Later that day we drove into the park for sightseeing and a picnic.

The park is home to 1,500 black bears. That means that, on average, there are two bears for every 1 square mile. A lot of people see real bears during their trip. Stan and his mom saw two different bears as we were driving through the park. We were driving fast, and they only caught a glimpse. I was very jealous.







But, later that night, I was the first to spot a bear walking directly below the deck of our chalet. He wasn't the least bit afraid of us. He even stopped, sat down, and looked at us for a while.

It's true. Everyone needs a good, smart bear.

Happy Birthday Alex!!

This Christmas. Grandma, Grandpa, Alex, Wyatt, Rider.

Alex is my one and only niece. This past week, she celebrated her 21st birthday.

So, what can I tell you about Alex? I have a lot of funny memories where Alex is concerned. I'll give you the short version of a few. Once, my dad (her grandpa) ran her over with a wheelbarrow. (This is par for the course in my family. My mom was once ran over by a bed, and my brother was ran over by a hay wagon.) That same weekend, she spent a lot of time digging for treasure (quarters) in our garden and telling our elderly neighbor that she "couldn't see a thing" without Grandma's ruby red reading glasses. On another weekend, it was a game to see how many fried eggs she could eat. (Maybe the best thing about this was that Grandma obliged, and I kept saying, "Are you sure she should eat MORE eggs?!")

The first time I ever laid eyes on her was when she ran into my room (at age 3 or 4), grabbed a lipstick and ran away with it! For a few years, Alex loved to play games like Connect Four or Tic Tac Toe but ONLY if we played for money. When I got married, Alex was a bridesmaid in the wedding. She was the one who came to me at the reception, tears streaming down her face, saying, "Oh my God! They're spanking Grandpa! It's the funniest thing I've ever seen!" If it weren't for her, I'm sure I would have missed seeing two of my African American lady friends spanking my dad's backside (in unison) on the dance floor.

Happy 21st, Alex! I hope you enjoy it -- it only comes once in a lifetime. I had a lot of fun on my 21st birthday. I was a student at OU, and my housemates and I threw a huge keg party complete with an in-house band. Our living room was transformed into a stage/dance floor and everyone rocked out in full 90s style. Along with just about everybody we knew, there were scores of people whom we did not know but simply showed up because there was a great party going on. I'm sure that cops came, as they always did, but it was cool. We just told them we'd do whatever it was they were asking us to do. And everyone had a great time. (At least, this is what I believe happened on my 21st birthday. I have been known to mix all of my party weekends together. Brain cells were lost along the way.)

The next day we went to our favorite bar (Tony's) and I did a shot with the bar owner (Tony) to celebrate my 21st birthday. (We had been drinking there for a few years, so it was a little bit awkward to tell Tony that I was turning 21 -- after he and his staff had served alcoholic beverages to me for so long! But on the other hand, he could celebrate the fact that I had made it to the other side and could now be counted among the legitimately "of age" regulars at his bar. I'm sure I wasn't the only one to do a 21st birthday shot with Tony.)

Anyway, happy birthday Alex!!! We love ya!!

Esther is a Pooper and She Smells Like Cottage Cheese

Esther (aka Boober, aka Stinky Moe, aka Pooper) is the best cat who ever lived. Like most cats, she is furry and speaks in meows. But in many ways, Esther is different than the rest. For example, she sleeps in the bed with us under the covers and stays there all night until "the family" gets up in the morning. When we come home from work, she is waiting at the door to greet us. When we eat dinner, she sits on a chair at the table (waiting patiently -- or not so patiently, depending on the fare -- for a bite).

When we sit on the couch and watch TV, she climbs onto one of our laps and falls into a deep and laid-back sleep until it's time to go to bed, which she knows is ten-ish. If we stay up past our bedtime, she has been known to stand at the bedroom door and meow until we join her. On the weekend, she seems to accept that we stay up past ten, and retires to the bedroom on her own (at ten o'clock).

Esther goes outside under semi-supervision. She knows where her yard begins and ends. She's usually pretty good about staying in her own yard, as long as she knows we are watching her. She acts up every now and then. For example, if we have people over to our house and we are not babying her as we usually do, she will climb onto the top of our piano (stepping on a few low octave keys on her way up) and then stare into the corner and howl. This means that she is ready for everyone to go home and for Mommy and Daddy to shower her with affection. This is about has unruly as she gets.

Once, when we were away on vacation, her caretakers accidentally closed and locked the kitchen door (the door that goes to the basement and to her litter box). It was about 24 hours before the problem was discovered/fixed, but to everyone's surprise, it appeared as if Esther had left no "surprises" in the house.

When we came home from our trip, we did find one spot where Esther had relieved herself. The poor dear must have scoured the house for the best possible place to do her thing, and (other than the toilet) we couldn't have chosen a better spot ourselves. She found a wadded up old towel in the back of a closet and that is where she decided to pee. All we had to do was throw away the towel. Now, if you don't have any pets, this may not sound too impressive. Most pet owners in this situation, however, would come home to Zoo Central on the living room floor. A lot of pet owners, in fact, come home to Zoo Central on the living floor even when their pet was given plenty of access to proper potty places.

Esther loves me and Stan both, but she is definitely Daddy's Little Girl. Stan has made up a library of songs in Esther's honor. Here are a few. (Keep in mind that the lyrics were chosen mainly for humor and rhyming effect -- not for accuracy of content.)

Her name is Esther,
She is a kitty,
And she smells like cottage cheese.

Her name is Esther,
She is so shitty,
And she's so damn hard to please.

***

Rub-a-dub-dub,
Put Esther in the tub
And mix her up with some applesauce.

Happy Birthday Brian!

Happy Birthday in Chinese

First, let me say that I never should have started this birthday stuff because every time I turn around it's either someone's birthday or it WAS someone's birthday and I forgot it or it WAS someone's birthday and I didn't forget it, but I never blogged about it either. The latter is the case when it comes to Brian. I remembered his birthday and reminded myself each day for two weeks to blog it. Nevermind that after the first week, his birthday was over!

Brian is my big brother, and I have always looked up to him. He is ten years older than me, so when I was three, he was thirteen. I remember being three years old and how I would take a bath every night and then put on my night gown. After bath time, it was TV time for the family. I remember walking into the family room, all washed and pretty and gowned, and Dad and Brian would whistle at me until I blushed. Then they would fart until the room was unbearable. It was great fun. Now Brian is a dad himself, and I can assure you that his two sons would act the same way if they were blessed with a baby sister.

Happy Birthday big brother!

Easter 2008

Conversation between my 4-year-old nephew Henry and his mom at church on Easter Sunday during communion ...

Henry (watching the priest administer communion): I want some of those chips.

Ardra: You can't have any, Honey. You have to be a certain age.

Henry: Why do I have to be a certain age? Are they spicy chips?


Later in the van after church ...

Grandma Cookie: So, I told Henry that, yes, Jesus is in our hearts. His spirit and his kindness and his joy.

Henry: Grandma, is that kind of like the FORCE in Star Wars?

Everyone: YES!! It is kind of like that.

Henry: But the FORCE is stronger, right uncle Eric (Stan)?

Uncle Eric (Stan): That's RIGHT Henry.

Happy Birthday Mom!

If you remember the pictures from my dad's birthday, these pictures of my mom will surely explain why they are meant for each other.

This is my mom playing the washboard at a Zydeco bar on Bourbon Street in New Orleans. That's a feather boa she's wearing. She had been watching the washboard player and studying his every move. And he noticed. So, he gave her the board and let her have a go at it.

Happy Birthday, Mom!! We love you!

Happy Birthday Wyatt!

Wyatt in red. Rider in yellow.

Wyatt is my nephew, and today is his birthday. Wyatt was the first grandchild born to our family. I remember the day he was born. We were all so happy! When I got to the hospital, my mom and dad were standing outside and my dad had tears in his eyes. Mom and Dad had driven to Canton from Mansfield. I had driven from Cleveland, and Jason had driven from Toledo. It was a GREAT day for the Solingers.

And Wyatt has continued to amaze us ever since! He is a very smart young man, and his teachers cannot say enough nice things about him. He has many "female admirers" but he doesn't usually refer to them as girlfriends. He loves sports and can hold his own in adult conversations regarding the Indians, Browns, or Cavs.

Happy Birthday Wyatt!! We love you!!

Picture Perfect

I'm sort of in a funk and just don't have any good ideas for posts. Here is a picture you might like. It is my mom's family when she was about four years old (I think). My grandma and grandpa are in the back row. The two older girls are my Aunt Jeanne and Aunt Evelyn. The handsome little boy is my Uncle Jack. Next to him is my mom and next to her is my Aunt Carolyn.

My mom is looking down because she was wearing new shoes and she was admiring how pretty they looked. In another snapshot from this same photo shoot, my uncle is looking up at an airplane. And in both, Aunt Carolyn is struggling horribly with the family cat.

Happy Birthday Rider!!

Rider is my nephew, and today is his birthday. Rider is a stellar athlete. He loves baseball, basketball, and football. He is also a terrific hugger and a very smart young man. He loves to play UNO, eat popcorn, and go on long strenuous hikes up very big mountains in Tennessee. Happy Birthday, Rider! We love you!

Happy Birthday, Jason!

Ok, so we have a lot of November birthdays too. Today is my brother Jason's birthday. I tried to find a less goofy picture, but apparently, Jason makes goofy faces whenever I point the camera his way. He's not really cross-eyed, but it is true that he likes Budweiser and the Browns.

Happy Birthday, Karen!

Karen is my sister-in-law, and today is her birthday. (Take note of this picture, because it is the only known image in existence of by brother doing dishes.) Karen is a great mom and, quite possibly the world's biggest baby lover of all time. She just LOVES babies. She is very excited for her new niece to hurry up and get here.

Happy Birthday, Dad

Happy birthday, Dad! Most of you already know Mr. Ed, but if you don't, these pictures will give you a pretty good idea of what kind of guy he is. The picture above was taken at Siesta Key Beach in Florida. Every Sunday night at sunset, you can catch a groovy drum circle complete with drums, dancing, inscense, ex-hippies, new age healers, and plenty of onlookers -- young and old alike. My parents LOVE to attend this weekly event when they are in Florida. In this picture, they are posing with Papa Love (or something like that -- I forget his name).


The pictures below are from an Indians game in the 90s. Believe it or not, my dad is now an usher for the Cleveland Indians and has been entrusted to prevent or punish behaviors such as this!


GO TRIBE!!

Happy Birthday, Hailey

Ok, so we have a lot of October birthdays in my family. Tomorrow is Hailey's birthday! Hailey is my brother's girlfriend, but she really deserves a better title than that. You see, she has dated and lived with my brother for at least four years. They aren't officially engaged yet, so I can't say that she is my brother's fiance, but I think it's safe to say that she is my future sister-in-law. Hailey is a ray of sunshine. I don't think I can remember her ever being in a bad mood. She is also a big Indians fan, and I'm sure she will celebrate big time tomorrow at Jacob's Field. Happy birthday, Hailey, and GO TRIBE!!

Happy Birthday, Ardra

Stan’s parents were here for a visit this weekend, and while the guys worked on a home improvement project, Cookie and I went to the zoo with Henry. Henry is my four-year-old nephew. He likes all the animals except for the gorillas. He had a bad experience with a gorilla during a prior trip to the zoo. The gorilla ran up and pounded on the window, scaring everyone. Apparently, he is not the only one with Gorilla Fear. When we came upon the gorilla exhibit yesterday, we saw a toddler lying on the ground, screaming and clutching his mother’s ankle as she dragged him across the ground toward the gorilla area. I wonder what the gorillas think about us.

This is a picture of Henry with his “mummy” (Stan’s sister Ardra). Yesterday was Ardra’s birthday, and she was on a business trip. Ardra is a great sister-in-law. She was very supportive when we found out about the fertility issues, and she wrote a terrific letter of recommendation to our adoption agency when we started this new journey. Happy birthday, Ardra!! We missed you yesterday!!