Showing posts with label cleveland. Show all posts
Showing posts with label cleveland. Show all posts

Saturday, March 1, 2008

Real Entries in Our Local Paper's Police Blotter




A 62-year-old man who lives in the 14100 block of Kennerdown Avenue threatened President George Bush, prompting a visit by agents from the U.S. Secret Service. The agency did not return calls seeking information. Police here said they did not know the nature of the threat.


Thieves in Garfield Heights will steal not only the kitchen sink, but the new faucet, the kitchen counter, copper pipes, the furnace and the hot water tank. Such was the case when police arrived at a home on Maplerow Avenue. The front lockbox was missing and the door was unlocked. The key was lying on the basement floor near a pack of chocolate cupcakes ... (the thievery doesn't surprise me -- it's the mention of the chocolate cupcakes).


The Marymount Villa also experienced a robbery. A man called and said someone stole his mother's dentures valued at $2,800. He said an unknown Hispanic woman stole them, but there aren't any Hispanic women employed there.

Sunday, November 4, 2007

Harvey & Anthony


American Splendor #1 cover (outside Tommy's in Coventry)

If you've read my sidebar, you know that I dig Harvey Pekar. Who is this Harvey Pekar, you might ask? Well, let me introduce you. Harvey Pekar, age 68, now lives in my favorite neighborhood of Cleveland (Coventry Village in Cleveland Heights). When I lived there, I used to go for walks on his street (before I even knew who he was or that he lived there). He's into vintage jazz and record collecting. He thinks negative thoughts 24-7. He worries a lot. His wife and adopted daughter are everything in the world to him.

He loves the grit of Cleveland like a muskrat loves his musk. He has lived here his whole life, and for the most part, lived in some of the not-so-cushy neighborhoods -- in neighborhoods where money is earned with sweat and perseverance, and ethnic loyalties run deep. In other words, neighborhoods like mine. Places where, if it weren't for the perpetual snow and cold of the Cleveland winter, the demographic stirring of the iron ore melting pot we call home would probably result in more crime and violence than is currently observed. (That snow keeps us all indoors-- and complacent -- for four or five months out of the year.)

Harvey is a retired file clerk. Have you ever worked with files? I don't mean on your pc, I mean real, manila folder files with labels on them? Most people my age have not. It is a loathsome task. When it was needed, I used to file customer records at a cell phone company. Imagine (those of you working in offices now) if you had to ask A PERSON to bring you a file every time you wanted to review a client's history or read the memo about XYZ or refresh your memory on the specs needed for blah blah blah? Harvey was the one who would get you that file. He must have had one of the dullest day jobs anyone could ever imagine.

However, he's one of the most influential and ground-breaking comic book writers of all time. Pekar was one of the first comic book writers (or really, any kind of writer) to chronicle his broodings of the mundane and mostly unrecognized events of human existence, particularly those wrapped in grimy gloominess and saturated in the stink of man.

A good example of this can be found in one of his stories, "Class Antagonism," in which Harvey's co-worker tells him he can't have any cake because he never brings food to the workplace for his co-workers -- he only takes and never gives. The story is told in nine frames and in about 100 words. That's all it's about! The "punchline" is when Pekar asks this co-worker if it's ok for him to eat donuts left by the Johnson & Johnson salesman, since no one in the building paid for those. And she says she doesn't care.

In a more "exciting" episode, Harvey tries to interview some guy about "the most important phenomena in Cleveland during the 1930s." The guy tries to tell Harvey that the Goldberg hustlers called Maggies sold linoleum (or magnoleum, as they called it) to immigrants, blacks, and farmers on the corner of 117th and Kinsman during the depression at outrageously high prices in order to satiate their gambling addiction. When, during the interview, the guy's story doesn't "add up," the guy admits to his own dishonesty but defends himself saying, "Socrates said all men are dishonest, so even he was dishonest." The last frame of the comic shows Pekar musing, "There you have it folks -- now you know all about the Maggies with a little Socrates thrown in."

It's like a comic book version of Seinfeld, written by George, and set in 1970s/1980s Cleveland. In many ways, Pekar is the lone pioneer of the story of nothing. He is truly a creative genius. But not every story was about nothing. Although Pekar's stories were always about regular people within his circle of friends, on his street, or at his workplace, many of the stories centered on such heady themes as race, love, divorce, charity, labor, cancer, and (of course) the pure angst of being Harvey Pekar.

On top of all that, he's an acclaimed jazz critic and author of several books. A movie based on his autobiographical comic book series American Splendor featuring Paul Giamatti as Harvey was nominated for Best Adapted Screenplay at the 2003 Academy Awards. But don't get the idea that Harvey ever made any substantial money on all this. For most of his career, the comic writing caused him to lose money. He's a regular guy. He stayed on as the file clerk (what he called his "flunky" career) until retirement age. His following is not mainstream, but cultish and underground. He's the unsung hero of Cleveland.

Recently, Harvey joined the Travel Channel's Anthony Bourdain for a Cleveland episode of "Anthony Bourdain, No Reservations." I missed it when it first aired, but I finally got to see it last week, and it was great.

Here is some of what Anthony had to say about Harvey (from the travel.discovery.com web site for No Reservations):

When my old crony, Ruhlman, said he was going to introduce me to Harvey Pekar I was frankly -- intimidated. Pekar was like ... the poet laureate of Cleveland! I'd been following his American Splendor books since the 70s. I'd seen the movie ... I knew he was supposed to be this cranky, misanthropic working class guy with a loathing for TV phonies.

He turned me on to Zubal's Books, this amazing repository of all the world's printed knowledge in an old TWINKIE factory. They even let Ruhlman drink vintage twinkie filling out of the ancient pipes!

He introduced me to Toby, the only guy in the world who could make a giant rubber stamp interesting.

We all went to Sokolowski's University Inn: me, Harvey, Joyce, Toby, Danielle ... Wow, these guys are really great! Cleveland definitely does not suck! ... They were, all of them -- incredibly cool and nice. Smart, funny weird? Yes ... but these days? The perfect American family.

Click on the link below to see a clip from the show.

Monday, October 22, 2007

It's Monday and Everything Stinks

Well, the Indians blew it and life goes back to normal here in Cleveland. No more late nights trying to BELIEVE. No more wishing the radio was in sync with the television so as to avoid the Boston-loving-bastards at Fox. No more Big Poppy spitting into his gloved hands and smacking them together like patty cake. No more rally towels. No more bull pen percussion ensembles. And no more pies.

Today I just feel let down. The Indians are done, and the word TRIBE makes me want to hurl. It seems as if the Browns will never be any good. The Cavs might be good this year, but I feel sour towards LeBron. All of this will heal with time, and then we'll have our hearts broken again.

On a brighter note, my husband just helped the police track down the latest "violator" on our street. For safety reasons, I won't go into detail, but it was a traffic incident in front of our house and Stan got to ride in the sqad car and everything! I just love this neighborhood.

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Dear Baby: What I love about Cleveland


Photo by laszlo-photo (flickr.com)

This is the first of a series of posts written as letters to my daughter.

Cleveland is rock n roll in everyone’s heart. Cleveland is jazz driving down the street in winter. Cleveland is rap for all the kids and R&B for all their grandparents. Cleveland is gospel on Sunday morning. Cleveland is an orchestra at Christmas.

Cleveland is steel. Cleveland is dirty. Cleveland is noisy. Cleveland smells bad. Cleveland is gray. Cleveland is cold. Cleveland is work. Cleveland is hard.

Cleveland is seagulls. Cleveland is brickwork. Cleveland is bridges. Cleveland is coming in from the cold. Cleveland is the beach. Cleveland is the Tribe. Cleveland is the Browns. Cleveland is LeBron.

Cleveland is Harvey Pekar and his stinky pages. Cleveland is the Pretenders on drive-time radio. Cleveland is Rockefeller Park with no one in it. Cleveland is the man selling lion-print area rugs on the corner of Lee and Miles. Cleveland is the saxophone player honking outside the Galleria. Cleveland is the thousands of office workers ignoring the saxophone player honking outside the Galleria. Cleveland is the teenager going to the Grog Shop. Cleveland is a woman waiting for the bus. Cleveland is people walking toward a stadium on a Sunday afternoon chanting, “Here we go Brownies, here we go.” Cleveland is a woman from Ukraine shopping at Marc’s.

Cleveland is a newspaper. Cleveland is a billboard. Cleveland is a mural. Cleveland is a church. Cleveland is a bar. Cleveland is a highway. Cleveland is a tree lawn. Cleveland is a train.

Cleveland is Carnegie. Cleveland is Euclid. Cleveland is the corner of East 9th and Prospect. Cleveland is East 238th. Cleveland is Apt 9 on Hampshire. Cleveland is the Shoreway. Cleveland is Dead Man’s Curve.

Cleveland is pierogis. Cleveland is stadium mustard. Cleveland is a panini. Cleveland is beer. Cleveland is pop. Cleveland is corned beef. Cleveland is soul food. Cleveland is a Cuban sandwich on Detroit.

Cleveland is everyone knowing every song. Cleveland is everyone knowing every band. Cleveland is my freshman roommates in college and all the people they introduced me to.

Cleveland is walking to temple on Saturday. Cleveland is Halloween always on Halloween night. Cleveland is the St. Patrick’s Day Parade. Cleveland is the Feast of the Assumption.

Cleveland is Marlena learning to read. Cleveland is Julius touching my hand. Cleveland is Crazy Irene looking up at me through her glasses. Cleveland is Joaquin visiting for the summer.

Cleveland is where we were when we fell in love. Cleveland is where we were when our hearts were broken. Cleveland is where we started over. Cleveland is where we married. Cleveland is where Esther has always lived. Cleveland is where everyone came to join us. Cleveland is where we were when we thought about you before you were born. Cleveland is where we will bring you home.